Oxfords, Penny Loafers, Bookbag: Check!

Goin' Back. Back. BACK, back to school again.

I've been in school for a week and a half.

Yesterday, I think I made a friend.

Her name is Irene, she's a clarinet major, and she's probably 18. I don't know if she is yet aware that I'm "approaching 30." We're going to hang out on Thursday and go get our email addresses, which, inconveniently, is a process that takes place 75 blocks south of Mannes College of Music.

When Irene realized that we were in two back-to-back classes together on Tuesdays and Thursdays, she started speaking to me.
I thought she was an undergrad. I thought a lot of the kids in my classes were undergrads. Turns out they are not, they simply aren't going to go to college. This diploma is all that they're going to have. That's cool! Liberal arts shmiberal arts! Who needs to take an anthropology elective if you know you're gonna rock it out on your Oboe for eternity?

My classes are made up of students who are either 18 and who are over 40. I have seen, maybe, two people who seem to be in the middle, like me, but I have not spoken to any of them. So far, Irene has really kinda been "dissing" the over 40 crowd.

"Jen!," She stops me by slapping me on the bookbag as I head down the stairs, "That lady who was sitting next to me in theory needs to chill the f-out! She doesn't need to answer all the questions. There are other people paying to take this class too!" Then she pauses and becomes a high school student, "I don't want to go to Music History."

Truth is, that lady and I were both answering all the questions. In high school, I didn't participate in class because I didn't always know the answers, and I didn't really understand why I was learning. In college, I didn't participate in class unless I knew my answer was brilliant, which happened very rarely. In both cases, I ended up feeling like a passive observer instead of an active and enthusiastic class participant. The teachers either didn't see me at all, or grouped me in with the slackers. In college, this was devistating, because I really did have a passion for what I was learning. Except for Modern Electronic Technology, which I dropped after a week of listening to the professor explain how bar codes worked.

My point is: In the past I have held a reeeal steady resentment towards any overly-active class participant. That f-ing brown-noser who sits in the front row of class and talks to the TA for 15 minutes before and after class has been #1 on my shit list. Why did she get an A in the class!!! That IDIOT didn't really get it! I GOT IT. . . I just didn't talk to anyone about it. like only douchbags do.)

Until now. I have decided to be that douchbag. Actively. And I love it. I did pay to take these classes. So, I'm taking a front-row seat. I'm interrupting the professor when I don't understand. They all know me. I'm the theremin player.

So, Did Irene not notice that I was being as obnoxious as that loathsome lady? Maybe she was trying to "learn" me the ways of Mannes. Maybe she looks at me and thinks I have Pink Lady potential, but I just need to proove it to the rest of the kids at the senior carnival. In all seriousness, though, what the crap did Sandy ever get from Danny, other than a lifetime (and even that is wishful thinking) of greased-up boot-knocking? (Sure, they defied science in that last scene when the "lightnin' " took off into space, but look at us, 50+ years later with no flying cars.) I bet Patty Simcox is a Nobel Prize-winning neurosurgeon who spent 5 years in Uganda with the Peace Corps and who, now, in addition to her career, runs 3 non-profits while training for triathalons with her best-selling novelist husband, while her kids maintain an organic soybean farm in Rhode Island and raise Triple-Crown-worthy stallions.

My response to Irene's, "I don't want to go to Music History, " lament?

"Why not? Come on! It'll be interesting!!"

Irene, if you google me and find this blog, please don't take offense. You're awesome. And not only because you gave me your locker combination and told me we could share. (For reals, My back is killing me and I really needed a place to store my amp at school. Thanks!) But you're awesome because you play the clarinet and you have helped me actively choose to become a mature student. See ya Thursday!

What Happens in VEGAS . . .

Stays in Vegas.

Right, Wycleff?

I got tagged. Now I have to tell you 5 things about me that you don't know.

Eliza did this to me. Evidently, this is a blog game.

OKAY! I'll play! Stop poking me.

If you are reading this and have heard one of these 5 secrets of mine, you are one of maybe 2-5 people IN THE WHOLE WORLD that knows these things, so please don't call me out on it. . .

Here goes:

1. ) This is something I just found out yesterday: The kidney stone that I had in August never passed and now it has grown. It was 2mm in August. Then I ran a marathon and it grew to 5mm. So, I'm just sitting around at home with some percocet ready, drinking water, and waiting for it to pass before I go to Vegas this weekend. HOORAY!!

2.)When I was a girl of 5 years or so, my parents got me a pupply. A shi-tzu puppy. The breed of dog was not my decision, nor was the name. My father named this poor pooch Dr. Wellington Koo after the "Finance Minister of China during the Chiang Kai-shek regime. " That was the quote I used to explain the name from 1983 until the poor pups passing around 1991 or so. My paternal Great Grandfather, Wilbur Hammaker, was a Bishop in the Methodist Church. His many years as a missionary in China with his lovely wife Willamina is what, I assume, inspired my father to name the dog in such an uppity fashion. Wellington stunk because of terrible skin problems but that didn't stop my mom taking him everywhere with her in the Oldsmobile.

3.) Speaking of China, I am currently eating leftover Chinese food.

4.) When I am home in Atlanta, I watch the TV show Charmed almost every day. It comes on from 8am to 10am, weekdays on TNT. I don't always catch the full 2 hours, because I will only watch the show if no one else is in the room (out of obvious embarrassment) and my parents wake up between 9am and 10am.

5.) Someday, hopefully before I'm 40, I want to have a huge family -- meaning a husband and more than 2 kids. And I want to live in a noisy house where the doors are always open to visitors and the kitchen is always fully stocked. I guess what I'm saying is, I may have eclectic tastes, but I want to live a typical American life. Someday.

Now I will tag 5 people.

Natasha
Becky Y.
Frannie P.
Ashley
Amanda

Go to it!!

Countdown to Vegas: 7 days

I'm going to Vegas in 7 days. Three of my friends from high school and I will be spending a weekend in "Sin City" to celebrate the year that we all turn 30.
Some of our plans include:
* Seeing Cirque du Soleil!
* Eating a fancy meal!
* Eating a buffet-style meal!
* My 2nd trip to a SPA!
* Going to see the fancy-ass stage show, Jubilee!, complete with a cast of hundreds and headdresses!
* Dancing at a trendy club.
* Not gambling very much!

But, before I go party my twenties away, I have to audition for the extension program at Mannes School of Music. I have convinced the director and assistant director of this program to open their minds and their school to me and my theremin. If accepted, I will be a classical theremin major and I will begin my studies as soon as I get back from Vegas.

I can't help but view this trip to Vegas as a real ending to my 20's. I don't actually turn 30 until April 22nd, but 30 years ago on January 22nd, my babymomma was beginning her 3rd trimester, so I was a little girl already fo sho.

My feelings on the matter are as follows:

I'M SO GLAD MY 20's ARE OVER!!

I spent my 20's trying to figure out what I want to do with my life. It took me 10 years to figure this out. If I hadn't fallen on my face so many times, humiliating myself and those around me, I would never have figured what I want to do: play an impossibly obscure instrument and attempt to do so in a way that may bring me great scrutiny from real-time musicians!

It is only because I have failed doing several other things during my 20's that I am able to venture forth into unknown territory without fear.

So please keep me in your thoughts on Tuesday as I audition for this music school. If accepted, I will be a pioneer in my currently non-existent field of study.

If I am denied, well then, I'll just begin my 30's on my actual birthday, April 22nd, 2007.

Oh! And if anyone has been to Vegas lately and has any itinerary suggestions, please let me know!

Happy Birthday, weirdo.

Countdown to Vegas : 9 days

Observations and information on January 10th, 2007:

1. Hey Whoopie, what's with the stoner shades? I've never seen you look through them. That's not some kind of metaphor.
2. I am hopelessly obsessed with my cat, Tobias. I've never felt this way about a cat before. Sorry Ludlow. It just wasn't the same and, quite frankly, you seemed to be able to move on so easily! Professor: If you can actually read, congratulations. You have far surpassed my expectations and I am to blame for that.
3. I just saw The Queen. She is a fantastically complex Lady and I admire her. She reminds me of my mother.
4. Speaking of my mother, she just had her second CT scan and the results are astounding. She has only 10% of her tumors left. This news defeats the odds, is quite extraordinary, and proves that anything is possible. Thank you all for your kind thoughts and prayers.
   

December, 1975

Thanks, Christmas!

The good news is: I will be back in NY on Friday.

The better news is: I have had a vastly fulfilling experience in Atlanta!

I really won this year in the Christmas present category.

Yes, I'm bragging. I am fantastically blessed.

For Christmas, I asked for some "help" from my parents because I am going to Vegas with 3 of my high school friends. What I got was:

1.) Plenty of "help."

We all know what this means. I usually HATE to ask for help and consider it bad luck. This time, it was different. I've been home for almost a month and during my time here, I have been working almost constantly. The errands I run for my parents are similar to the errands I ran at the Palace of Employment. I return items to department stores. I get supplies (groceries). Instead of filing, I've been scanning and archiving 30+ years of photos. Instead of putting together an office cocktail party, I threw a Holiday party for my mom AND did most of the cooking. I tolerated living in my parents house for approximately four weeks - a walk in the park in comparison to what I put up with from some of my former co-workers on a bad day. Also, I'm a much better employee here than I was at the Palace because I spend much less time idly surfing the internet.

2.) My Holiday Bonus: A new theremin.

3.) And, last but not least, from my best friend and her husband, I got:

A Goddaughter: Lucy Ann (in pink).

This year is already trumps last year.